Often, people I work with on trauma feel like they’ve tried everything. Some have been through one overwhelming event. Others have struggled for a long time, sometimes for as long as they can remember. Either way, living with it is exhausting, and having to hide how you feel can be lonely. I work at a pace that feels safe and manageable. Life will still bring challenges, but the aim is for you to feel more in control and more able to cope with them.

What is trauma? How do I know if I’ve experienced it?

Trauma is an emotional reaction to a distressing or overwhelming event, or a series of events. What makes something traumatic isn’t only what happened, but how it affected you, and whether you had the support you needed at the time. Trauma is rarely neat or easy to identify. Sometimes the things we struggle with over a long time cause trauma, such as ongoing conflict, criticism, or feeling unseen or unheard.

When something overwhelming happens, your brain and body switch into survival mode: fight, flight or freeze. Usually this settles once the danger has passed.

After trauma, the survival response can be triggered easily if there is a perceived threat. This is a trauma response, designed to keep you safe.

Memories of what happened can also be stored differently, so they feel as though they are happening now rather than in the past. If something triggers that memory it can feel as if you are still in danger, even when you know logically that you are safe.

People who have experienced trauma can:

• Feel on high alert much of the time, jumpy, or unable to relax.
• Have flashbacks, nightmares or distressing memories that seem to come from nowhere.
• Feel numb, cut off from their emotions, or as though they are watching life from a distance.
• Have intense emotions, like anger, fear or shame, that feel out of proportion or hard to control.
• Have a harsh inner critic, or hear critical voices, inside or outside their head.
• Avoid people, places or situations that remind them of what happened.
• Struggle to trust others, or feel isolated and hopeless.

These things can have a huge impact on every aspect of life. I have worked with clients who couldn’t see a future, and have found hope and even joy in life. It is possible, no matter how unlikely it may seem right now.

Different kinds of trauma

Trauma can come from a single event, like an accident, an assault, a sudden or traumatic loss, or a medical emergency. It can also build up over time, one experience on top of another. This might be physical, emotional or sexual abuse, neglect, bullying, or growing up in a home that didn’t feel safe.

It might be a run of difficult events, like losses, illness or relationships that hurt you. Often, after a traumatic event it can feel very difficult to cope with the feelings and physical symptoms that follow. With time, and resources (including people in your support network, or therapy), things settle and you start to feel more normal again.

Complex trauma happens when someone is repeatedly exposed to trauma. When things keep happening, it can feel like there was never time to recover from one before the next came along. Without that time to process, trauma symptoms build up and it can feel hard to function.

Relational trauma often involves people you should have been able to trust, or situations you couldn’t easily get away from. When it begins in childhood, it’s sometimes called developmental trauma, because it shapes how you grow up feeling about yourself, other people and the world.

The benefits of outdoor therapy for trauma

Trauma isn’t only held in your thoughts. It’s held in your body too, in a nervous system that is braced for danger. Being outdoors can help with that. Many people find their body starts to settle when they’re moving, breathing fresh air and surrounded by green space, and that can make it easier to think and talk.

Sitting face to face in a small room can feel intense, especially if you find it hard to trust people or feel watched. Walking side by side takes some of that pressure off. You don’t have to make eye contact or fill the silences, and there is always somewhere else to look. Nature also gives us lots of ways to come back to the present. Noticing the sound of the wind, the feel of bark under your hand or the ground under your feet are all very grounding. We will use the space around us to help you build ways to ground yourself inside and outside therapy.

Being outside also gives you more choice. You can walk faster when you need to move, or stop and sit when you need to slow down. That sense of choice and control matters when trauma has taken it away. Some places or situations might not feel safe for you, like being somewhere isolated, crowded or overlooked. We’ll talk about this from the start, and choose locations and routes together so that you feel as comfortable as possible.

Why trauma can be missed

Trauma doesn’t always look a certain way. People often come to therapy for something else, like anxiety, low mood, an eating disorder, intrusive thoughts or overwhelming emotions, and the trauma underneath only comes to light later. Ways of coping that once kept you safe, like controlling food, staying busy or shutting down, can become the focus, while what led to them is overlooked.

This can also be true true with borderline personality disorder (BPD), sometimes called emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD). Many people with this diagnosis have experienced trauma, and there is a lot of overlap with complex PTSD: intense emotions, difficult relationships, and an unstable sense of who you are. Some people find the diagnosis helpful. Others feel it describes their reactions without recognising what caused them. It should be about both.

Trauma can also be missed when you seem to be coping, when you don’t remember much of what happened, or when you’ve learned to think of it as normal. If you are neurodivergent, years of being misunderstood or treated as though something was wrong with you can be traumatic in itself, and the overlap between trauma and ADHD or autism can make it hard to untangle.

My work focuses on how these experiences connect, with or without a diagnosis, rather than treating them in isolation.

How counselling can help with trauma

Some of the things I would aim for in trauma work include:

• Flashbacks, nightmares and intrusive memories becoming less frequent and less intense, and sometimes stopping altogether.
• Feeling less on edge, or less like you’re constantly scanning for danger or waiting for the next thing to happen.
• Noticing when you’re being triggered, and having ways to bring yourself back to the present.
• The critical voice becoming quieter, with less blame and shame.
• Feeling more connected to your emotions, and to other people.
• Getting your sense of self back, and being able to think about the future.

I have worked with people who couldn’t see a future, and who have found hope and even joy in life. It is possible, however unlikely it may seem right now.

How I work with trauma

I work in a trauma-informed way. That means recognising that what you have been through may have deeply affected you. It’s important that we work at a pace that feels safe, and doesn’t put you back into a place of feeling unsafe or traumatised. You are in control of what we talk about and when.

I draw on a range of approaches, including CBT, DBT and psychoeducation, adapting them to fit you. Psychoeducation means learning why you are experiencing certain symptoms. Many people find it a relief to understand that their reactions make sense, and aren’t a sign that something is wrong with them. If something isn’t working for you, we’ll explore other things.

Three stages of working with trauma

The first stage is to work towards you feeling safe and steady. This means building ways to cope with overwhelming feelings, so you can stay present rather than going into panic, fight or flight or shut down (freeze). This is the foundation of our work together, and there’s no rush: feeling safe is the priority. Trying to process trauma before you have ways to cope can make life harder.

The second stage is about working through what happened. This isn’t about retelling everything. It’s about being able to think about the past while staying grounded in the present, so memories that feel vivid now lose their power and become part of your story, rather than something you’re reliving. It’s also a chance to look at beliefs that came from what happened, like it being your fault.

The final stage is about reconnecting with yourself, other people and your life. This is where the changes start to become part of everyday life, in your relationships, your work, what matters to you, and the support you have around you outside therapy.

Everyone’s journey looks different. Throughout our work we’ll keep building on feeling safe, and you might notice yourself reconnecting with life and others along the way.

Talking about what happened

Many people expect that trauma therapy means going over what happened in detail, again and again, and that can be enough to put them off. But you don’t have to go into upsetting detail to work through trauma. Talking about the past can help, but it isn’t the only way. We also work with what is happening in the present: noticing how your body reacts, what sets it off, and what helps you feel steadier. We can work with the feelings and beliefs that came from what happened, like shame, fear or self-blame, without going through the events themselves. Some people find it easier to give an outline, to write things down, or to express them creatively. It will be up to you as to what you share, when you’re ready.

Working with trauma outdoors

Working outdoors, feeling safe is about the place as well as our relationship. Early on, we’ll usually meet somewhere familiar and predictable, with clear paths and a sense of where we are. Some people like to return to the same route each week, so it becomes a place that feels known. Others like more variety once they feel settled.

We’ll agree how you can let me know you need to stop, slow down or change direction, so you don’t have to explain in the moment. If something we pass is triggering, like a sound, a smell or someone approaching, we can pause, move away, or use it as a chance to practise grounding.

Walking can make difficult conversations easier, because moving helps regulate the nervous system. When we talk about harder things, I’ll keep an eye on how you’re doing, and we might slow down or find somewhere to sit. The walk back is a chance to settle, so you leave feeling steady.

Nature often finds its way into the work too. You might notice something that reflects how you feel, like a tree that has grown around damage, or a path that’s hard going. These can sometimes be easier to talk about than the thing itself.

You choose how close we walk, where we stop, and when you need a break. If you are neurodivergent, I can adapt sessions around pace, movement, sensory needs, or how much I talk.

What working together looks like

Everyone’s experience of trauma is different, but as a guide, trauma therapy can look like this:

First session

We start by getting a sense of what’s going on for you: what brings you to therapy, how things are affecting your life, what you’ve already tried, and what helps. You don’t need to tell me everything that happened. We’ll also talk about how you feel about being outdoors, including walking, different weather, and any places or situations that feel unsafe, so we can find the location and pace that work for you. We’ll start to think about what you want from therapy, even if that’s just knowing you want things to be different.

Stage 1: Feeling safe and steady

This stage might include:

• Building trust between us, so therapy feels like a safe place.
• Learning how trauma affects the brain and body, and why you react the way you do.
• Understanding your window of tolerance (the zone where you can feel your emotions without being overwhelmed or shutting down), and gradually widening it.
• Noticing what’s happening in your body, and finding ways to calm yourself when stress builds.
• Grounding, using the natural world around us: sounds, textures, the ground under your feet.
• Looking at boundaries, the support you have around you, and everyday things like sleep, eating and movement.

Stage 2: Working through what happened

This stage might include:

• Processing traumatic memories, a small piece at a time, and stopping to settle before going further.
• Working with fear, guilt, shame and self-blame.
• Grieving what was lost, or what you never had.
• Finding ways to express what happened, through words or more creatively.
• Developing more self-compassion.

Stage 3: Reconnecting

As things begin to shift, people often notice:

• Being triggered less often, and feeling more hopeful.
• Understanding themselves better, and letting go of blame for how they coped.
• A stronger sense of who they are.
• Healthier relationships, and more confidence in handling difficult ones.
• Finding new interests, and building what they’ve learned into everyday life.

Throughout all three stages, sessions might mean walking and talking side by side, or finding somewhere quiet to stop and sit for a while. Our work is collaborative, so we decide together where we walk and how we use the session. I will check in with you regularly, and if something isn’t quite right, whether that’s the route, the pace or the way we’re working, we’ll change it.

Our work is collaborative, so we work together both in terms of planning and carrying out therapy, but also in terms of choosing where we walk and how we use the session. I will support and guide you as needed.

Although we may have a longer term plan, there is always space for what feels most important in the moment. That might mean walking further when you need to move, or slowing down when you need to stop. I will check in with you regularly, and if something isn’t quite right, whether that’s the route, the pace or the way we’re working, we’ll change or adapt it.

Questions you may have

Starting therapy

I offer a no cost 30 minute initial consultation by telephone, Zoom or face to face. It’s a chance to talk about what’s going on and work out together whether I’m the right fit.